Preparing Next Gen. Part Six:Using family meetings and the family council to develop leadership skills

Activities that would normally happen as part of any family meeting can be terrific learning laboratories. Someone
has to contact participants, figure out dates, location, division of roles and responsibilities, caterers, how much the family will do themselves, set-up of the facility, fun and involving actives for the kids. Figure out which tasks would involve leadership organization and planning skills that can be used to teach children. Expect more of young adults who are twenty-two than of children
who are thirteen. But a thirteen year old can be involved in the cleanup crew, and can work with siblings and cousins to do it (as we mentioned above).

All kinds of opportunities can be turned into learning experiences. Real work experiences are the primary driver of leadership learning. You can actively create these experiences, rather than passively hope that they come along. Structured, planned experiences are the main tool of leadership development. The learning experience should stretch the skills of a young person. It should be a real job that needs to be done for business reasons and should have its own business urgency—it should not be a
flagpole-painting assignment.

In corporate settings, a lot of studies show that the richest leadership opportunities involve learning through the work itself: by doing a six-month project in a part of the business she doesn’t know, a young family member will have to learn rapidly from others,
make quick decisions, accomplish a timely turnaround, and build relationships in a hurry. She will have to come to work the day after making tough choices and work through any fallout from those choices.

Any family event that provides these opportunities—preparing and serving food, organizing recreational activities and games, cleaning up—can help you assess and teach coordinating and decision-making skills. When you consider such opportunities, don’t think about how to get these jobs done, but about how to get them done in ways that can assess and develop the capabilities of your children.

Even a driving trip can be turned to assessment and development. One client told the story about driving with her daughter (then about ten years old). She gave her daughter the map, and began a discussion. If this is our destination, and traffic holds as it is now, when will we arrive? Where should we stop for lunch, and what time will we get there? What would the fastest route be? Which would the most scenic route be? Where might we want to stop and walk around if we took the scenic route? What would you recommend if we were to blend part of the fastest route with part of a scenic route?

This exercise in a naturally occurring family event (a driving trip) assessed and developed critical thinking skills. If you look at common family events with the eyes of a developer of tomorrow’s leaders, you will see all kinds of opportunities such as this.

The tools and processes are available to assess many traits and characteristics in young adults and children, and to bridge gaps if they are not too big or too numerous. There is a lot you can do through targeted development. For example, one son, Johnny, may have an MBA but lacks experience in business leadership. His assessment indicates that he has the right stuff in terms of traits and personality characteristics for effective leadership.

An assessment of his brother Ray, on the other hand, indicates that he is not particularly communicative, is not interested in training, or in influencing others. He would rather do a task himself than delegate and experiences success from hands-on direct
accomplishments. He has little interest in coaching, mentoring, or teaching others. He can be an asset to the business but he is unlikely to succeed in a leadership position.